Progress

There's always a learning curve when you start a new job. But for some reason, the job I'm in right now, that learning curve has been...well, it's taken a LOT longer than any other job I've ever had. But lately, I've finally felt like I'm making some breakthroughs. I finally feel assured of myself, in a way I haven't before. I think part of the reason for this is that I was, frankly, kind of traumatized by my last job. I was so beaten down by the end of my time in that job that I had really lost all the confidence I'd gained in my years with the company. And it's taken this long to get that back. Add to that the fact that I started this job when I was pregnant (not, generally, the most productive time, career-wise) and then I missed a chunk of time for maternity leave, and it just took a long time to hit a stride. This week, we're dealing with a lot of stuff that's pretty stressful. It's the first time I've been in this situation that I haven't been in a perpetual state of panic. I'm starting to trust myself, my intelligence, my judgment. Thank God. I don't think I could have lived that way much longer.